Saturday, July 23, 2011

Stuff That Our Kids Will Never Know About Or Use

Audio-Visual Entertainment
Inserting a VHS tape into a VCR to watch a movie or to record something. (What?)
Playing music on an audio tape using a personal stereo. (hehehehehe)
The number of TV channels being a single digit. I remember it being a massive event when Britain got its fourth channel.
Standard-definition, CRT TVs filling up half your living room. (Kwanza the Rich Families with the 30inch Tvs)
Rotary dial televisions with no remote control. You know, the ones where the kids were the remote control. (Shit! I have like three remotes)
High-speed dubbing. (hehehehehe Kwanza when the owner of the tape wants it back ASAP)
Vinyl records. Even today’s DJs are going laptop or CD. (Boogie on Down)
MiniDisc. (What the hell where these for anyway)
Laserdisc: the LP of DVD.
Scanning the radio dial and hearing static between stations. (Well bado we still have these)
Shortwave radio. (BBC anyone?)
3-D movies meaning red-and-green glasses. (Bado haijafika huku vizuri)
Watching TV when the networks say you should. Tivo and Sky+ are slowing killing this one. (HI bado haija fika huku)
That there was a time before ‘reality TV.’ (Oh yes The Kardashians)

Wires. OK, so they’re not gone yet, but it won’t be long. (hmmmmmmmm)
The scream of a modem connecting. (ding, ding zoooorg, tru, tru, ding!)
The buzz of a dot-matrix printer. (Banks still use these printer)
5- and 3-inch floppies, Zip Discs and countless other forms of data storage. (what imaging installing Windows 95)
DOS. (One of the hardest programmes to do)
Screens being just green (or orange) on black. (hehehehe)
Daisy chaining your SCSI devices and making sure they’ve all got a different ID.
Counting in kilobytes. (bwahahahahaha)
Wondering if you can afford to buy a RAM upgrade. (tihihihihi)
Blowing the dust out of a NES cartridge in the hopes that it’ll load this time. (dang!)
Turning a PlayStation on its end to try and get a game to load. (yes Oh my old friend PS 1)
Joysticks. (Never used them)
Having to delete something to make room on your hard drive. (Computer ya kalekachali)
Booting your computer off of a floppy disk. (Windows 95 na 98)
Recording a song in a studio. (hehehehe at 4 oclock and usiku)

Everything Else
Taking turns picking a radio station, or selecting a tape, for everyone to listen to during a long drive. (unless umebuy gari ya japan na you haven’t oput on an after market receiver)
Remembering someone’s phone number. (yeah)
Not knowing who was calling you on the phone. (hehehehehehehe)
Actually going down to rent a movie on Tape.
Toys actually being suitable for the under-3s.
LEGO just being square blocks of various sizes, with the odd wheel, window or door. (I played with these)
Waiting for the television-network premiere to watch a movie after its run at the theater. (That never happens in Kenya)
Neat handwriting. (Oh Snap)
“Don’t know what a slide rule is for …”
Finding books in a card catalog at the library.
Swimming pools with diving boards.
Sliding the paper outer wrapper off a Kit-Kat, placing it on the palm of your hand and clapping to make it bang loudly. Then sliding your finger down the silver foil to break off the first finger. ( oh happy days)
Having to manually unlock a car door. (even starting it)
Writing a check. (I hate these things)
Roller skates, as opposed to blades.
Cash. (I love these but mpesa is stealing it)
Libraries as a place to get books rather than a place to use the internet.
Spending your entire allowance at the arcade in the mall.
A physical dictionary — either for spelling or definitions.
When a ‘geek’ and a ‘nerd’ were one and the same. (there is a difference?)

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