Saturday, December 25, 2010


Soo much unexpected has happened this year. I have seen and heard of soo much that I did not know. At the end of it all, I've come to one conclusion

Kenya is a Fucked Up country and we are all Fucked.! But I still love it here...(sic)

The truth about Laziness

Laziness is simply the habit or resting before you get tired(sic)

Tuesday, December 21, 2010

If poem




IF you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you,
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
But make allowance for their doubting too;
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or being lied about, don't deal in lies,
Or being hated, don't give way to hating,
And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise:
If you can dream - and not make dreams your master;
If you can think - and not make thoughts your aim;
If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster
And treat those two impostors just the same;
If you can bear to hear the truth you've spoken
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,
And stoop and build 'em up with worn-out tools:

If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings
And never breathe a word about your loss;
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: 'Hold on!'

If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
' Or walk with Kings - nor lose the common touch,
if neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you,
If all men count with you, but none too much;
If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds' worth of distance run,
Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it,
And - which is more - you'll be a Man, my son!


Saturday, December 11, 2010

Serenity Prayer for Online Addict

God, grant me the serenity to accept a server I cannot change,

Courage to walk past the computer without turning it on

.. when I'm running late for work,

And the wisdom to know the difference between

"Come to bed now" (meaning "Let's have some fun!")

...and "Come to bed NOW!" (meaning "That computer has got to GO"!)


Monday, October 18, 2010

Women as sex objects

Why do women complain when we call them sex objects..i mean when u ask 4 sex they object..

Tuesday, June 29, 2010

Dear Lord...

Grant me the serenity to accept the things i cnt change,the courage to change the things i cannot accept and the wisdom to hide the bodies of those pple
i had to kill today bcoz they pissed me off.And also help me to be
careful of the toes i step today as they may be connected to the ass
that i may have to kiss tomorrow.Help me to always give 100% at work
12% on monday,23% on tuesday,40% on wednesday,20% on thursday,5% on
friday.And help me to remember when am havin a really bad day and it
seems that people are trying to piss me that it takes 42 muscles to
frown and only 4 to extend my middle finger and tell them to bite me.

Friday, June 18, 2010


I know #Bankelele, the real Bankelele...
He owes me a hundred favors...

Tuesday, June 15, 2010

How Stupid is this?

Calling up yu(Essar) customer care coz I don't have internet settings on my phone, the voice prompt tells me to visit the yu website( for the settings.
How retarded is that..????

Monday, June 14, 2010

The End of the World

...And I believe the World is burning to the ground,
Oh well, I guess we gonna find out,
Let's see how far we've come
...And I believe it all is coming to an end,
Oh well, I guess we gonna pretend,
Let's see how far we've come

Thursday, June 10, 2010

A deeper meaning

  • Work is a necessary evil to b avoided.
  • I can tell u R lying,your lips are moving..
  • I am not prejudiced,I hate everyone equally.I used to be lost in the shuffle now i just shuffle along with the lost..
  • Sorry but my karma just ran over your dogma...
  • I refuse to have a battle of wits with an unarmed opponent...
  • The objective of war is not to die for your country but to make the other bastard die for his...
  • I know you think you understood what I said but what u heard was not what i meant....
  • I don't have a drinking problem, I drink, I get drunk, I fall down, no problem

The Beauty of Mathematics

Beauty of Mathematics!!!!!!!

1 x 8 + 1= 9
12 x 8 + 2= 98
123 x 8 + 3= 987
1234 x 8 + 4= 9876
12345 x 8 + 5= 98765
123456 x 8 + 6= 987654
1234567 x 8 + 7= 9876543
12345678 x 8 + 8= 98765432
123456789 x 8 + 9= 987654321

1 x 9 + 2 = 11
12 x 9 + 3 = 111
123 x 9 + 4 = 1111
1234 x 9 + 5 = 11111
12345 x 9 + 6 = 111111
123456 x 9 + 7 = 1111111
1234567 x 9 + 8 = 11111111
12345678 x 9 + 9 = 111111111
123456789 x 9 +10= 1111111111

9 x 9 + 7 = 88
98 x 9 + 6 = 888
987 x 9 + 5 = 8888
9876 x 9 + 4 = 88888
98765 x 9 + 3 = 888888
987654 x 9 + 2 = 8888888
9876543 x 9 + 1 = 88888888
98765432 x 9 + 0 = 888888888

Brilliant, isn't it?

And look at this symmetry:

1 x 1 = 1
11 x 11 = 121
111 x 111 = 12321
1111 x 1111 = 1234321
11111 x 11111 = 123454321
111111 x 111111 = 12345654321
1111111 x 1111111 = 1234567654321
11111111 x 11111111 = 123456787654321
111111111 x 111111111 = 12345678987654321

Mind Boggling...

Saturday, May 29, 2010

Kenyanese culture

Kenya, a country where most people write in a Language few speak(English)
And most people speak a language few can write(Kiswahili)

Pirates don't give a F****

Date: Sat, 21 Aug 2004 18:21:43 -0100 (GMT)
From: anakata
Subject: Re: Unauthorized Use of DreamWorks SKG Properties

On Mon, 23 Aug 2004 wrote:

> Dennis L. Wilson, Esq.
> 9720 Wilshire Blvd., Penthouse Suite
> Beverly Hills, CA 90212
> Tel: (310) 248-3830
> Fax: (310) 860-0363
> August 23, 2004
> Box 1206
> Stockholm 11479
> [email]
> Re: Unauthorized Use of DreamWorks SKG Properties
> To Whom It May Concern:
> This letter is being written to you on behalf of our
> client, DreamWorks SKG (hereinafter ^ÓDreamWorks^Ô).
> DreamWorks is the exclusive owner of all copyright,
> trademark and other intellectual property rights in
> and to the ^ÓShrek 2^Ô motion picture. No one is
> authorized to copy, reproduce, distribute, or
> otherwise use the ^ÓShrek 2^Ô motion picture without
> the express written permission of DreamWorks.
> As you may be aware, Internet Service Providers can
> be held liable if they do not respond to claims of
> infringement pursuant to the requirements of the
> Digital Millennium Copyright Act (DMCA). In
> accordance with the DMCA, we request your assistance
> in the removal of infringements of the ^ÓShrek 2^Ô
> motion picture from this web site and any other sites
> for which you act as an Internet Service Provider.
> We further declare under penalty of perjury that we
> are authorized to act on behalf of DreamWorks and
> that the information in this letter is accurate.
> Please contact me immediately to discuss this matter
> further.

As you may or may not be aware, Sweden is not a state in the United States
of America. Sweden is a country in northern Europe.
Unless you figured it out by now, US law does not apply here.
For your information, no Swedish law is being violated.

Please be assured that any further contact with us, regardless of medium,
will result in
a) a suit being filed for harassment
b) a formal complaint lodged with the bar of your legal counsel, for
sending frivolous legal threats.

It is the opinion of us and our lawyers that you are ....... morons, and
that you should please go sodomize yourself with retractable batons.

Please also note that your e-mail and letter will be published in full on

Go fuck yourself.

Polite as usual,

Sunday, May 23, 2010

God and Men

God isn't Fair
He's Justified

Monday, May 17, 2010

Mama's Boy

No woman, no cry

Finally, Elton(not I) understands the meaning of Woman no pain

Thursday, May 13, 2010

Quote Unquote

An idle mind is the Devil's workshop but then again Action is the enemy of thought.

In africa

In Africa, a Lion wakes up knowing that it must outrun the slowest Gazelle. And a Gazelle wakes up knowing that it must outrun the fastest Lion...!

Monday, April 26, 2010


Between me and Poverty,
there is an ATM

Wednesday, March 31, 2010


  1. You ask Makmende who he is and he tells you who you are!
  2. Makmende can slam a revolving door!
  3. Makmende is the guy who rubs his book when the teacher rubs the black
  4. Makmende doesn't use power tab in his mosquito net he just presses tab
  on his computer.
  5. Makmende once frequented K-street, he is now saved.
  6. Obama(always a Kenyan all the time) is afraid he might not stand the
  chance for a second term, unless Makmende allows him.
  7. The reason Google is still in China is because of Makmende.
  8. Don't dream about Makmende, he will hear you.
  9. Makmende is the reason why there was traffic jam in Makueni.
  10. South Africa are already issuing a security threat posed by Makmende
  during world cup.
  11. It is said the reason Chelsea was beaten in Champions league is
  because Makmende was spotted in the pitch.
  12. Makmende went around the world in one day.
  13. Tom and Mary dropped out of school because of bullying by Makmende.
  14. Makmende showed up at Pizza Inn and took all the pizza.
  15. Moses broke the ten commandments due to fear when he saw Makmende.
  16. I hear Makmende uprooted the railway on his own - Museveni should be
  very afraid!
  17. Makmende does not use M-pesa, Zap or Yu cash, he runs the system.
  18. Makmende beat the hell out of GSU as they tried to deport him.
  19. Makmende has revolutionized the car industry with the new Toyota Mark
  20. The dude can hang clothes on his Safaricom line.
  21. After eating garlic Makmende doesn’t smell like garlic but garlic
  smells like Makmende.
  22. The only reason you’re conscious right now is because Makmende
  doesn’t want to carry you.
  23. Makmende can look at your photo and know you are lying.
  24. Nobody knows what would happen if Chuck Norris and Makmende met, but
  one thing is for sure: Makmende would still be standing.
  25. Always look before you leap. Unless Makmende is chasing you. Then you
  had better just jump.
  26. Makmende refused a syringe at a blood bank. Instead, he asked for a
  gun and a bucket.
  27. Makmende found Bin Laden. Let him go, and found him again for his own
  28. Makmende doesn’t drink honey. He chews bees.
  29. Makmende doesn’t have nightmares. Nightmares have Makmende.
  30. Makmende and Superman once had a fight. They bet that whoever lost
  would wear his underwear outside his pants.
  31. If Makmende was Spartan in the movie 300, the movie would be called
  32. Makmende doesn’t need a translator. Pain sounds the same in every
  33. The Boogieman checks his closet for Makmende.
  34. The Dinosaurs laughed at Makmende…
  35. Makmende has been to Mars. Why do you think there’s no life on Mars?
  36. Makmende does not date women...he doesn't need to.....
  37. The truth hurts. Not as much as Makmende.
  38. Nyongesa the sane and the immediate chairman of ladies tried to be
  like Makmende once - he was surprised by the turn of events - ask him......!

Sunday, March 21, 2010

Fear of Failure

Am not afraid to fail. Am just afraid of how far I'll go and what I'll do inorder not to...!

Monday, March 15, 2010



Where do I even start.? Sigh, I give up. At least I cant be faulted for not trying!

Saturday, March 6, 2010

Of people and crossing over

on both sides of the road there's always someone trying to cross to the other side.

Tuesday, February 2, 2010


Seriously, what's with this "modern" Kenyan galz? They want to be like me, to be an equal. Are they serious? Listen up mami, you CANNOT walk a mile in my shoes. You have no idea where am from and the shit I've gone thru.


If you are going to tell a lie, make it big enough and keep repeating it then people will eventually believe you.
Adolf Hitler

The Decisions we make Define who we Are!